Evening! I am currently bit by bit upgrading my wardrobe. Gone will be the days when I wore T shirts and blue jeans...except on Sundays of course! Now you will see me creeping around Filene's Basement looking for beautiful Ralph Lauren shirts and fresh pressed trousers. Currently, my new Steve Madden shoes gained their first miles, and tomorrow I will pop my clogs on my new black Rockports.
Oh dearrr, has olde Robert gone vain? Well, let me tell you one thing, I do love my new clothes. I am starting to discover the feeling of looking dignified, and that is very important because:
1. I know I am not a tzaddik and thus I need to feel good about myself.
2. Good clothes make me feel good.
3. When I feel good, I automatically want to make other people feel good.
4. I am smiling, I am more pleasant to be around
5. Mitzvah observance, actually gets much much easier when I am happy!
6. I serve Hashem much better.
Hmm, maybe gashmiut, good physical living helps kick the neshamah into action, just like you need a battery and a nice starter motor to get the Ferrari or the Rolls started!
Im not advocating blowing huge gobs of cash on clothes. Nowadays, you can get fantastic clothing at Filene's Basement, Macy's, and DSW Shoes for a fraction of the cost you would get at boutiques. I havent finished yet, I have plans to get more trousers and some nice suits, IY"H. I pray to Hashem that He finds me some great sharp clothes at excellent low prices so that I will be able to serve Him and my fellow people with an expansive and smiling heart!
I should have some nice pictures of my Chanukiah in action soon. Keep your seatbelts fastened!
Monday, December 18, 2006
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Shalom Bayit Speech
It's a beautiful day in DC, after the cold start, we end with beautiful sunny skies and nice spring-like temperatures.
Hmm, this is kind of like me at times, I wake up and feel so grouchy and grumpy. However as the day rolls on, I break out in a smile, and am grooving along!
Now there are times when we are feeling either sad, vulnerable, scared, or just plain tired. We do our thing, and for some odd reason, we cause one of our friends or loved ones to criticize us.
Now we all know that criticism does not work. For people who are reading Dale Carnegie, and keeping an intense Torah learning, those guys especially understand the futility and destructive nature of criticism. Even scoundrels like Al Capone considered themselves "public benefactors who are not appreciated for what they are".
Therefore, the next time somebody says SOMETHING to you that makes you want to retalliate, consider saying this to them instead:
-----------------------------------------------------------------
I’m sorry. I have to say that I am feeling very upset.
I just cannot talk to you right now, not because I dislike you, rather I am not thinking properly and the issue can degenerate into a competition where the most important thing for me is victory at all costs! Therefore, any further points on your part, no matter how beneficial they are, will just make me more aggressive and stubborn!
I need to go away and calm down. When I am myself again, I will be more than happy to talk with you, and discuss the issue together!
Thank you.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Feel free to copy and paste this text. If you wish to modify it, that would be good too! Carry a copy around with you, and when the tomato flies, hand the 'tomato-thrower' this nice note. You'll be happy you did!
I bless you all with tons of Shalom Bayit!
Hmm, this is kind of like me at times, I wake up and feel so grouchy and grumpy. However as the day rolls on, I break out in a smile, and am grooving along!
Now there are times when we are feeling either sad, vulnerable, scared, or just plain tired. We do our thing, and for some odd reason, we cause one of our friends or loved ones to criticize us.
Now we all know that criticism does not work. For people who are reading Dale Carnegie, and keeping an intense Torah learning, those guys especially understand the futility and destructive nature of criticism. Even scoundrels like Al Capone considered themselves "public benefactors who are not appreciated for what they are".
Therefore, the next time somebody says SOMETHING to you that makes you want to retalliate, consider saying this to them instead:
-----------------------------------------------------------------
I’m sorry. I have to say that I am feeling very upset.
I just cannot talk to you right now, not because I dislike you, rather I am not thinking properly and the issue can degenerate into a competition where the most important thing for me is victory at all costs! Therefore, any further points on your part, no matter how beneficial they are, will just make me more aggressive and stubborn!
I need to go away and calm down. When I am myself again, I will be more than happy to talk with you, and discuss the issue together!
Thank you.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Feel free to copy and paste this text. If you wish to modify it, that would be good too! Carry a copy around with you, and when the tomato flies, hand the 'tomato-thrower' this nice note. You'll be happy you did!
I bless you all with tons of Shalom Bayit!
Monday, December 11, 2006
If I forget thee o' Jerusalem....
Good morning. I just cannot believe that the Israeli government are negotiating with the Vatican over Mount Zion again! We are starting to give away our prize jewels, King David's Tomb over to the Church, G-d forbid!
Now I am definately for peaceful negotiations, and brother getting along with brother. However there must be a condition: We behave in a civilized manner and we recognize our territory. I heard one man say "Be master of your territory!" Well the Israeli government (more like junta or oligarchy) is anything but the master of it's territory. In girlish cease-fires, appeasing in a whiny way to America and Europe, and kicking Jews out of their rightful places, the government has no control.
Now comes the big daddy of them all: giving our territory to the Vatican.
Hmm, look the Church has tons of territory. Just go to the Vatican and see all the marvels, all the gold and silver they own! And they come salivating on OUR land, OUR city?
Hmm, how about a UN demand stating that Great Britain must give Westminster Abbey to the French, or America must give the Alamo back to the Mexicans?
Political writing is not one of my talents! And yet, I feel obligated to do my best to defend the honour and glory of our beautiful city, Yerushalayim!
Do anything, give an extra cent or dollar, euro, or yen to charity and say "Im doing this for Yerushalayim." Learn an extra 5 minutes of Torah, say a little prayer of your own words during Shema Koleinu in the Amidah. Reconnect with past rivals, and bury the hatchet! Buy a flower for your spouse. ANYTHING! These are OUR weapons for world peace! Let us bit by bit work on smoothing our rough edges and our characters, and we will be able to greet our Moshiach bimheirah b'yameinu!
Now I am definately for peaceful negotiations, and brother getting along with brother. However there must be a condition: We behave in a civilized manner and we recognize our territory. I heard one man say "Be master of your territory!" Well the Israeli government (more like junta or oligarchy) is anything but the master of it's territory. In girlish cease-fires, appeasing in a whiny way to America and Europe, and kicking Jews out of their rightful places, the government has no control.
Now comes the big daddy of them all: giving our territory to the Vatican.
Hmm, look the Church has tons of territory. Just go to the Vatican and see all the marvels, all the gold and silver they own! And they come salivating on OUR land, OUR city?
Hmm, how about a UN demand stating that Great Britain must give Westminster Abbey to the French, or America must give the Alamo back to the Mexicans?
Political writing is not one of my talents! And yet, I feel obligated to do my best to defend the honour and glory of our beautiful city, Yerushalayim!
Do anything, give an extra cent or dollar, euro, or yen to charity and say "Im doing this for Yerushalayim." Learn an extra 5 minutes of Torah, say a little prayer of your own words during Shema Koleinu in the Amidah. Reconnect with past rivals, and bury the hatchet! Buy a flower for your spouse. ANYTHING! These are OUR weapons for world peace! Let us bit by bit work on smoothing our rough edges and our characters, and we will be able to greet our Moshiach bimheirah b'yameinu!
Thursday, December 7, 2006
We are paper men!
Good morning! A lot of events have happened in this short week. Of course world-wide, Iraq is going down the slippery mountain. It aint a slippery slope anymore! Rat face Achmadinejad is rattling his sabres and the evil Baker is giving 'helpful' recommendations for Israel to concede more precious land. In my home country, a tornado ripped through North London injured 6 and left many homeless.
In our town, I saw a house on fire! Right next to the shul, while I was davening Shacharit, I heard tons of sirens. At the end, somebody pointed me to the window, and I saw FLAMES. A townhouse engulfed in flames and smoke! It was a miniature 9/11 right in our neighbourhood! The day before that, a driver with a suspended license crashed her BMW SUV into another apartment block rupturing the gas line and causing a major explosion and fire.
On a personal note, 2 very dear friends had to go to the hospital. One was going for a routine checkup, and the doctors found a blocked heart valve. The other one was leaving an exercise group when he experienced huge pains. He had a kidney stone. Baruch Hashem, they are alive and feeling great today.
Why do I say all this? To remind us, including myself -especially- that life is so precious and fragile. We think we are so strong and mighty, that I have all the time in the world!
However we are like paper men. We are so fragile and delicate that even 1 sheet of paper can seriously pain us if we cut ourselves on it. Just one slip of a knife, a sheet of ice on the road, one microscopic bacterium or virus, and we're toast!
And likewise, one minute it's a normal Tuesday, and the next, 9/11!
I especially am guilty of this, and have to refer to this blog thousands of time to push this important message in my thick lazy stubborn mind.
May Hashem have mercy on us, and may Hashem give us strength to understand and internalize these crucial messages and to wake up, grow spiritually and face challenges at our own pace and win!
In our town, I saw a house on fire! Right next to the shul, while I was davening Shacharit, I heard tons of sirens. At the end, somebody pointed me to the window, and I saw FLAMES. A townhouse engulfed in flames and smoke! It was a miniature 9/11 right in our neighbourhood! The day before that, a driver with a suspended license crashed her BMW SUV into another apartment block rupturing the gas line and causing a major explosion and fire.
On a personal note, 2 very dear friends had to go to the hospital. One was going for a routine checkup, and the doctors found a blocked heart valve. The other one was leaving an exercise group when he experienced huge pains. He had a kidney stone. Baruch Hashem, they are alive and feeling great today.
Why do I say all this? To remind us, including myself -especially- that life is so precious and fragile. We think we are so strong and mighty, that I have all the time in the world!
However we are like paper men. We are so fragile and delicate that even 1 sheet of paper can seriously pain us if we cut ourselves on it. Just one slip of a knife, a sheet of ice on the road, one microscopic bacterium or virus, and we're toast!
And likewise, one minute it's a normal Tuesday, and the next, 9/11!
I especially am guilty of this, and have to refer to this blog thousands of time to push this important message in my thick lazy stubborn mind.
May Hashem have mercy on us, and may Hashem give us strength to understand and internalize these crucial messages and to wake up, grow spiritually and face challenges at our own pace and win!
Monday, December 4, 2006
Dealing with the Shidduch Blues
Yesterday, I should have been in New York City. However I was home. The nice lady said last Thursday on the phone, that after chatting with me, things didnt click, and you know what....
Now I am a complete novice, and I have listened to my Rebbe, Lazer Brody constantly tell me that everything is from Hashem, the good and yes the not so good!
I believe this, and yet the emotions start to kick in. So much that I moaned to a wonderful shadchan for an hour about my fate. Baruch Hashem, she told me to wise up and keep fighting. Ladies and gentlemen, we must have emunah, and we must work on our faith and keep talking to Hashem.
And yet, we have to understand that we are still beginners, and that if we feel bad, that's normal too. In fact perhaps Hashem wants us to go through this bad feeling as a soul correction too. However we must not despair!
As a matter of fact, before I got the phone call, I was walking across the local golf course talking to Hashem saying, "Hashem, if this lady is NOT my basherte, then please have her reject me. HOWEVER, if she is my basherte, then please please may I get married to her as soon as possible and may I establish my family as soon as possible please!" So I got the answer a day later, and my friends, that answer was "NO, SHE IS NOT YOUR BASHERTE! HOWEVER I DECIDED TO SPARE YOU THE TIRCHAH, THE TROUBLE TO SCHLEPP TO NEW YORK AND BACK!"
It was a tough answer! Nobody, especially I love to be rejected. However once the negative feelings pass (and they will pass if you dont dwell on them), then you can start again fresh! Also, I had a wonderfully relaxing Sunday, and knocked lots of errands off my To Do List!
So
1. Keep talking to Hashem daily, as much as you can do!
2. If you experience bad feelings, it's normal. Just walk through them, like you walk through a rainy day, and dont pay attention to those feelings. It's also a tikkun too!
3. Find somebody (A rabbi, rebbe, therapist, shadchan, relative, friend) that you can confide in, and express your feelings to him.
4. Learn some Torah, or read some inspiring stuff.
5. Listen to some kosher comedy to make you laugh!
Keep on trucking!
Now I am a complete novice, and I have listened to my Rebbe, Lazer Brody constantly tell me that everything is from Hashem, the good and yes the not so good!
I believe this, and yet the emotions start to kick in. So much that I moaned to a wonderful shadchan for an hour about my fate. Baruch Hashem, she told me to wise up and keep fighting. Ladies and gentlemen, we must have emunah, and we must work on our faith and keep talking to Hashem.
And yet, we have to understand that we are still beginners, and that if we feel bad, that's normal too. In fact perhaps Hashem wants us to go through this bad feeling as a soul correction too. However we must not despair!
As a matter of fact, before I got the phone call, I was walking across the local golf course talking to Hashem saying, "Hashem, if this lady is NOT my basherte, then please have her reject me. HOWEVER, if she is my basherte, then please please may I get married to her as soon as possible and may I establish my family as soon as possible please!" So I got the answer a day later, and my friends, that answer was "NO, SHE IS NOT YOUR BASHERTE! HOWEVER I DECIDED TO SPARE YOU THE TIRCHAH, THE TROUBLE TO SCHLEPP TO NEW YORK AND BACK!"
It was a tough answer! Nobody, especially I love to be rejected. However once the negative feelings pass (and they will pass if you dont dwell on them), then you can start again fresh! Also, I had a wonderfully relaxing Sunday, and knocked lots of errands off my To Do List!
So
1. Keep talking to Hashem daily, as much as you can do!
2. If you experience bad feelings, it's normal. Just walk through them, like you walk through a rainy day, and dont pay attention to those feelings. It's also a tikkun too!
3. Find somebody (A rabbi, rebbe, therapist, shadchan, relative, friend) that you can confide in, and express your feelings to him.
4. Learn some Torah, or read some inspiring stuff.
5. Listen to some kosher comedy to make you laugh!
Keep on trucking!
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